Packing for the Paleolithic: Which Caliber for Dire Wolves?

So, we’ve all seen this movie before, right?

You know which one. The one in which an extinct species is brought back from evolution’s graveyard and begins to thrive in violent, unexpected ways. The one that starts with us observing the adorable little baby animals as they make their re-introduction into a world that has moved on. The one we’re living in right now, with the dire wolf puppies?

Yes, for those who didn’t know, dire wolves were (well, I guess that’s the wrong tense now, isn’t it?) a real species and not a fantasy concocted by one George R.R. Martin. Unlike the dinosaurs of That Movie We’ve All Seen, dire wolves only went extinct right around the time that human beings began farming their own livestock, about 10,000 years ago. This is probably not a coincidence.

Yes, there were also shifting ecological pressures as the world began emerging from an ice age. That said, like many of the megafauna of the era, like woolly mammoths and sabretoothed cats, chances are rather good that Homo Sapiens Sapiens played a role in the extinction of the dire wolf. That makes the situation a little bit different from the one outlined in That Movie We’ve All Seen. Nature didn’t exactly select this species for extinction; we humans did. That would seem to imply that maybe reintroducing dire wolves wouldn’t be such a terrible idea.

Well, unless you ask anyone who raises livestock what it means to have an intelligent, pack-hunting species roaming around. Like, say, the dire wolf’s much younger and smaller cousin, the gray wolf. You see, just because a species is capable of hunting down and killing large prey animals like moose doesn’t mean they want to. Would you rather run 15 miles and risk a brutal kicking, or hop a fence and grab a few calves and sheep without breaking a sweat? Yup, wolves feel the same way.

What else do we know about wolf behavior specifically? Well, we know that they are no pickier about interbreeding with domestic animals than they are about eating them. Wolves can and will breed with domestic dogs as well as coyotes. It’s happening right now, in fact. Western coyotes, which are the size of Cavalier King Charles dogs, have spread east and north over the last few decades, interbreeding with Canadian red wolves and domestic dogs along the way. That’s why Eastern coyotes are now the size of German shepherds.

So what should we do when life, uh, finds a way (and it will)? How should we respond when we find ourselves holed up in a storage shed because the electric fences have failed and the dire wolves are at the door? What gun/caliber combo would be best?

Well, the dire wolf was/is actually only about 25% larger than a gray wolf. That said, you have to multiply those 150-lb. animals by the number of them in the pack. (We’re not sure about the average pack size for dire wolves–that’ll be a fun surprise for the ranchers!) You also should remember that they have more robust skulls. That means that we’re going to need a caliber that most of us would think of as being overpowered for wolves, but we’re also going to need a caliber that works well in semi-automatic rifles, because we may just wind up needing every round in that magazine depending on the size of the pack.

Therefore, I would recommend that we think of our caliber choices in terms of modern black bears. That would mean that the caliber should start with a 3 (except for Euroweenie measurements, which should start with a 6). Personally, I think .308 Winchester would be a good starting place, although 6.5 Creedmoor would probably be okay too. The key is, I want to be able to start shooting while the pack is a couple of hundred yards away. Modern wolves can easily hit 30 mph at a dead run, and we should assume that dire wolves will be the same or faster. We need something that can definitively stop a charge on a heavy-boned and determined animal so that follow-up shots can be directed at wolves that are still mobile.

Does it sound as if I’m against the reintroduction of the dire wolf? Because I’m not. I’m just upset they didn’t start with sabretoothed cats.

What would you pack for the Paleolithic era? Tell us in the comments!